Maybe I am mistaking observation for introspection (self-reflection). I know that my own kids often exhibit these issues, so I must be sure I take my own advice.

Thank you for sharing information on dyslexia, whereas I didn’t realize this was a criterion in the situation. This is a good example of someone with the best intentions rushing in with their own solutions to another’s situation. I didn’t take time to fully diagnose before I prescribe.

The fact that you are even aware and working on this with your daughter is an amazing example of fatherly dedication to the well-being and development of your child. Many fathers don’t even bother to show up for parenting each day, which is unfortunate.

You are doing an amazing job!!! Endure to the end.

Sometimes backing off a bit on the child can relieve this social pressure for correctness. This may in turn relax the child, and then it may flow naturally out. The bottom line point here is that the child needs to feel like they are unconditionally loved and valuable no matter if they can perform in a specific task/subject or not. When the child feels that their self-worth is NOT on the line, they tend to put their toe into the water of learning again.

Also, fish aren’t good a flying… eagles aren’t good at swimming. Sometimes a particular skill set just takes a bit more time for certain kids. Kids grow in spurts, and not all kids will progress at the same rate, or in the same way. It’s important that the pressures of being a good parent don’t compel us to overlay our expectation of their progression on top of their natural areas of interest.

Also, from an adrenal stress arousal standpoint… the pressure to perform with a “test” situation (mommy and daddy are seeing if I’m smart enough), that can give the kid some “test anxiety” and thus trigger an adrenal condition (fight or flight), and thus the kid usually picks either flight (purposely getting it wrong, ignoring your question) or defiance (fight — a kind of “hey dad, forget about that, look over here instead”).

When adrenalized, the Human brain can only really recall from intellectual memory about 3 or 4 things, max. For example, the next time you are in a heated argument (not typical for us Mormons), or you become adrenalized, try to name all the 7 dwarfs from Snow White… or recall the process for solving a particular linear algebra problem.

Your cognitive abilities shut down (partially, depending on your phobic scale response level) and your brain’s limbic system (r-complex) kicks in… you have an animal/primal brain now, and accessing the higher neo-cortex functions is limited.

Just something to consider. I have no idea if this is really the case or not, I’m just speculating. Only you wife and you are fully qualified to know what’s best for your children.

Thanks for the situating conversation… we need more of that in the world!

For my students I use this resource. It helps just memorize.

http://mathskillbuilder.org/memorize_multiplication_table.html

It works great. I like it.